ID :
30910
Tue, 11/18/2008 - 18:47
Auther :
Shortlink :
https://oananews.org//node/30910
The shortlink copeid
JOURNEY NOT PAVED WITH ROSES (The 2nd of a three part feature) BY MELATI MOHD ARIFF
KUALA LUMPUR, Nov 18 (Bernama) -- For two unfortunate individuals, who we shall identify as Diana Ann and Jamaliah Sulaiman, being HIV positive is like experiencing a never-ending nightmare albeit a painful one.
Both of these women, rather unfortunately, contracted the dreaded Human
Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) from their respective husband.
What is more excruciatingly poignant is the social stigma bestowed on these
two hapless persons.
Social discrimination and disgrace thrown against this duo has made matters
worse as people living with HIV need all the support and strength they could get
from the society.
DIANA'S SAD STORY
The petite Diana Ann, despite being infected with the HIV since 1996,
portrays a picture of vigor and health.
The former nurse at a private hospital in Ipoh, Perak (Ipoh is the capital
of northern Perak state in Peninsular Malaysia) said she developed
bouts of fever, diarrhea and vomiting for two weeks before finding out that she
had been infected with the HIV.
"When the fever failed to abate, I decided to take a full medical test at
the hospital where I worked. However the result was not revealed to me, but I
was referred to Kuala Lumpur General Hospital (Hospital Kuala
Lumpur-HKL)".
According to Dianna Ann, the Matron who accompanied her to HKL did not
respond when she queried the former about the medical test result.
Only after meeting the medical officer at HKL's Infective Disease Clinic
that she was informed of the true picture, Diana Ann told Bernama after a media
workshop on HIV/Aids held here recently.
The doctor's words made Diana Ann to feel numb and shell-shocked.
Diana Ann's world collapsed and shattered around her, particularly when her
husband vehemently denied that he had infected her with the HIV.
After the news on her predicament broke out, Diana Ann's colleagues began
to shun her and the management had moved her to another department for desk
duties.
The misgivings did not stop there. The congregation at the church that
Diana Ann regularly attended had also avoided her.
"I thought that I would get the support from the church's community but I
was wrong".
All the discrimination and stigma had hurt badly.
"If there is a cut, we could always apply the bandage and medication, but
what could we do if the emotion is hurt?" she said.
CLOSE TO SUICIDE
With her deteriorating physical and mental conditions, at that time Diana
Ann felt that there was only one way out, by committing suicide.
"I saw no other way out. I invited two companions to go on a cruise ship.
At about 2am, I told them that I wished to take some fresh air. I went to the
deck and planned to make a jump (into the sea).
"I had left my friends a farewell note and also to my younger sister. As I
was about to make the jump, two of the ship's security personnel approached me
and asked what I was doing at a prohibited area.
"I told them that I was merely taking some fresh air. I returned to my
cabin and cried. At that moment, I felt that God was so close to me", said Diana
Ann.
Diana Ann returned to Kuala Lumpur and met her doctor, Christopher Lee. Dr
Lee's reassuring words are still fresh in her mind.
He had said: "Diana, turn all the lemons (sourness) in your life into a
sweet drink that you can give to others for them to quench their
thirst".
From that moment onwards Diana Ann grew from strength to strength.
JAMALIAH'S HEART-WRENCHING TALE
Meanwhile, for 42-year-old Jamaliah, she came to know that she was infected
with HIV after undergoing a medical check-up at a private laboratory in Klang
some 10 years ago after the demise of her husband, who was a known injected
drugs user.
"I was lost, not knowing what to do after learning that I had been infected
with the HIV. I feared telling my family and did not know where to get
counseling".
Jamaliah said despite being HIV positive, she remarried as this was the
wish of her late mother who was paralysed and vision-impaired.
She said the situation then was so difficult and knew that she would get
the blame.
The Klang-born Jamaliah said her husband discovered the real situation when
she was about four months pregnant. He was given counseling on how to prevent
the transmission of the virus but their marital relation soured and finally the
couple had to part ways.
She gave birth to a son, also found to be HIV positive. The small boy was
referred to the Kuala Lumpur Paediatric Institute under the care of Dr Kamarul
Azahar Mohd Razali.
The institute is the first support organisation that provided Jamaliah with
the counseling on her situation.
"From that moment, I realised that there are people who still care for me
and the road to the future is still widely clear.
"Before that it was very dark and gloomy for me and I felt guilty for
passing on the virus to my son," she said.
Jamaliah said people around her had given tremendous support for her to
move on and she was never left in the 'dark' alone.
"I became (emotionally) tough not only due to the assistance from the
doctors but my friends did a fine job as well in rebuilding my confidence. They
also made my family to welcome me back," said Jamaliah.
HIV POSITIVE BABY
For Jamaliah, life has also presented her with another challenging task as
her youngest child also carries the HIV.
From her earlier marriage, Jamaliah has a daughter and she also has an
adopted son. Both of them are HIV negative.
She said if her older children got sick, they would be alright after being
given medication but for her HIV-afflicted youngest son, the fever would prolong
for several days prompting her to seek medical attention.
Jamaliah said she began telling her youngest son, Ujang, about the
condition he was in, when the boy reached six years old.
Ujang's plight unfolded when he was not allowed to enroll at a primary
school after Jamaliah informed the school management that her son was HIV
positive.
However Dr Kamarul stepped in and after explaining the situation and true
picture to the school authorities, they relented and Ujang was finally given a
place at the school.
But for Jamaliah, the path towards adulthood for Ujang was not paved with
roses but instead littered with thorns.
It was heart-wrenching for this young mother when her youngest son started
to pose questions, and among the most painful was: "How much longer could I
live?(before succumbing to the disease)".
CHARITY WORK
For both Diana Ann and Jamaliah, they understand well the predicament that
they were in and had grown tougher meeting the challenges that lie
ahead.
Via the "Positive Living" programme organised by the PT Foundation, a
non-governmental organisation (NGO) that is active in providing assistance to
people living with HIV and Aids, both of these women obtained the much needed
moral support that they needed.
Diana Ann is now a full-time volunteer with the foundation and conducts
charity work including visiting patients at hospital.
She had been to Durban, South Africa in the year 2000 to relate and share
her experience living with the virus with HIV sufferers there.
According to Diana Ann, she learnt from her friends that her (former)
husband had died last year.
"It is sad as I still could not forgive him", she said.
Jamaliah, who is also a volunteer with the foundation, said she would
continue with her charity work apart from continuing life with her children.
"I have moved past the dark zone and now I am in the bright stretch. I
would continue assisting friends and use my experience to help others," she
said.
Jamaliah advised those who have been inflected with HIV as well as people
who have risks of being infected with the virus to seek immediate medical
attention and supports from the NGOs.
Now this gutsy lady is no longer alone facing the 'battle' as last May, she
tied the knot with another volunteer with the foundation, Marhalem
Mansur.
Marhalem is also HIV positive.
"My husband helped me a lot. I may reach the Aids stage but I am contented
and if I have to go (die), I have a husband who can look after my children
including Ujang," she said.
The parting words from Diana Ann and Jamaliah: "Please do not discriminate
against people living with HIV".
-- BERNAMA
Both of these women, rather unfortunately, contracted the dreaded Human
Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) from their respective husband.
What is more excruciatingly poignant is the social stigma bestowed on these
two hapless persons.
Social discrimination and disgrace thrown against this duo has made matters
worse as people living with HIV need all the support and strength they could get
from the society.
DIANA'S SAD STORY
The petite Diana Ann, despite being infected with the HIV since 1996,
portrays a picture of vigor and health.
The former nurse at a private hospital in Ipoh, Perak (Ipoh is the capital
of northern Perak state in Peninsular Malaysia) said she developed
bouts of fever, diarrhea and vomiting for two weeks before finding out that she
had been infected with the HIV.
"When the fever failed to abate, I decided to take a full medical test at
the hospital where I worked. However the result was not revealed to me, but I
was referred to Kuala Lumpur General Hospital (Hospital Kuala
Lumpur-HKL)".
According to Dianna Ann, the Matron who accompanied her to HKL did not
respond when she queried the former about the medical test result.
Only after meeting the medical officer at HKL's Infective Disease Clinic
that she was informed of the true picture, Diana Ann told Bernama after a media
workshop on HIV/Aids held here recently.
The doctor's words made Diana Ann to feel numb and shell-shocked.
Diana Ann's world collapsed and shattered around her, particularly when her
husband vehemently denied that he had infected her with the HIV.
After the news on her predicament broke out, Diana Ann's colleagues began
to shun her and the management had moved her to another department for desk
duties.
The misgivings did not stop there. The congregation at the church that
Diana Ann regularly attended had also avoided her.
"I thought that I would get the support from the church's community but I
was wrong".
All the discrimination and stigma had hurt badly.
"If there is a cut, we could always apply the bandage and medication, but
what could we do if the emotion is hurt?" she said.
CLOSE TO SUICIDE
With her deteriorating physical and mental conditions, at that time Diana
Ann felt that there was only one way out, by committing suicide.
"I saw no other way out. I invited two companions to go on a cruise ship.
At about 2am, I told them that I wished to take some fresh air. I went to the
deck and planned to make a jump (into the sea).
"I had left my friends a farewell note and also to my younger sister. As I
was about to make the jump, two of the ship's security personnel approached me
and asked what I was doing at a prohibited area.
"I told them that I was merely taking some fresh air. I returned to my
cabin and cried. At that moment, I felt that God was so close to me", said Diana
Ann.
Diana Ann returned to Kuala Lumpur and met her doctor, Christopher Lee. Dr
Lee's reassuring words are still fresh in her mind.
He had said: "Diana, turn all the lemons (sourness) in your life into a
sweet drink that you can give to others for them to quench their
thirst".
From that moment onwards Diana Ann grew from strength to strength.
JAMALIAH'S HEART-WRENCHING TALE
Meanwhile, for 42-year-old Jamaliah, she came to know that she was infected
with HIV after undergoing a medical check-up at a private laboratory in Klang
some 10 years ago after the demise of her husband, who was a known injected
drugs user.
"I was lost, not knowing what to do after learning that I had been infected
with the HIV. I feared telling my family and did not know where to get
counseling".
Jamaliah said despite being HIV positive, she remarried as this was the
wish of her late mother who was paralysed and vision-impaired.
She said the situation then was so difficult and knew that she would get
the blame.
The Klang-born Jamaliah said her husband discovered the real situation when
she was about four months pregnant. He was given counseling on how to prevent
the transmission of the virus but their marital relation soured and finally the
couple had to part ways.
She gave birth to a son, also found to be HIV positive. The small boy was
referred to the Kuala Lumpur Paediatric Institute under the care of Dr Kamarul
Azahar Mohd Razali.
The institute is the first support organisation that provided Jamaliah with
the counseling on her situation.
"From that moment, I realised that there are people who still care for me
and the road to the future is still widely clear.
"Before that it was very dark and gloomy for me and I felt guilty for
passing on the virus to my son," she said.
Jamaliah said people around her had given tremendous support for her to
move on and she was never left in the 'dark' alone.
"I became (emotionally) tough not only due to the assistance from the
doctors but my friends did a fine job as well in rebuilding my confidence. They
also made my family to welcome me back," said Jamaliah.
HIV POSITIVE BABY
For Jamaliah, life has also presented her with another challenging task as
her youngest child also carries the HIV.
From her earlier marriage, Jamaliah has a daughter and she also has an
adopted son. Both of them are HIV negative.
She said if her older children got sick, they would be alright after being
given medication but for her HIV-afflicted youngest son, the fever would prolong
for several days prompting her to seek medical attention.
Jamaliah said she began telling her youngest son, Ujang, about the
condition he was in, when the boy reached six years old.
Ujang's plight unfolded when he was not allowed to enroll at a primary
school after Jamaliah informed the school management that her son was HIV
positive.
However Dr Kamarul stepped in and after explaining the situation and true
picture to the school authorities, they relented and Ujang was finally given a
place at the school.
But for Jamaliah, the path towards adulthood for Ujang was not paved with
roses but instead littered with thorns.
It was heart-wrenching for this young mother when her youngest son started
to pose questions, and among the most painful was: "How much longer could I
live?(before succumbing to the disease)".
CHARITY WORK
For both Diana Ann and Jamaliah, they understand well the predicament that
they were in and had grown tougher meeting the challenges that lie
ahead.
Via the "Positive Living" programme organised by the PT Foundation, a
non-governmental organisation (NGO) that is active in providing assistance to
people living with HIV and Aids, both of these women obtained the much needed
moral support that they needed.
Diana Ann is now a full-time volunteer with the foundation and conducts
charity work including visiting patients at hospital.
She had been to Durban, South Africa in the year 2000 to relate and share
her experience living with the virus with HIV sufferers there.
According to Diana Ann, she learnt from her friends that her (former)
husband had died last year.
"It is sad as I still could not forgive him", she said.
Jamaliah, who is also a volunteer with the foundation, said she would
continue with her charity work apart from continuing life with her children.
"I have moved past the dark zone and now I am in the bright stretch. I
would continue assisting friends and use my experience to help others," she
said.
Jamaliah advised those who have been inflected with HIV as well as people
who have risks of being infected with the virus to seek immediate medical
attention and supports from the NGOs.
Now this gutsy lady is no longer alone facing the 'battle' as last May, she
tied the knot with another volunteer with the foundation, Marhalem
Mansur.
Marhalem is also HIV positive.
"My husband helped me a lot. I may reach the Aids stage but I am contented
and if I have to go (die), I have a husband who can look after my children
including Ujang," she said.
The parting words from Diana Ann and Jamaliah: "Please do not discriminate
against people living with HIV".
-- BERNAMA
